Lifespan

We have a book club which has been run for over three years. Almost everyone of us already left school and has started our career.

Today, we discussed about the relationship between lifespan and human gene. The article we read quoted one research and said our lifespan might be inherited from our father. There is biological evidence in our gene. And it is inevitable leading to a discussion about the desired lifespan.

One girl said when you are sixty, you will never feel 70 is enough for your life. Think about it is only 10 years left! However, I wonder why I am not afraid if my life will end just now. I don't know what to lose, what to be regretful for. (If not thinking about my beloved ones.) I really enjoy my life. I can feel happy for a cup of good coffee, listening to a good song, and aware of how lucky I am to be able to hear, to see, to eat, to smell, to walk, to type with my fingers. I cherish my life, but I never felt that I will feel sad if this is my last day of life. Is this strange?

I just watched "The Hours" yesterday. There is a scene when Ed Harris is rejecting Meryl Streep' invitation to the party. Ed questioned Meryl if she would be angry if he does not exist anymore, because he felt that he stayed alive only for her. Meryl was very angry and upset about this question. However, Ed still ended his life eventually. To live for someone that loves me, the motivation is still not strong enough to sustain the life of a person. Perhaps this kindly of motivation does not have a long-term effect? The nerves get weaker and weaker and surrender to the instinct. What I saw, is the berievement of the people left behind. How should we deal with this kind of trauma if someone left all of a sudden? (not only suicide, but I guess it hurts more when it comes to suicide...)